Yeah I know wank headline but deal with it, its the holiday season and I want some tang action, so glorifying posts will do for now. Chicks dig big stories anyway, so shhhh. Anyway Mark Wahlberg used his right to bare arms and unloaded a whole magazine into soccer football player David Beckham, claiming he lowered the tone of the neighbourhood and should feck off back to England.  Well Mark Wahlberg, bad news sunshine, he was a defective sale item, no returns, no refunds, should have checked the small print, your stuck with David and his pezhead wife pahahah!

Mark Wahlberg in Calvin Klein Trollies

Wahlberg says, “Man, the Beckhams. It used to be so quiet on my road. Then David moves in with his family. Suddenly we’ve got paparazzi hanging out day and night. Now they’ll follow any car that drives down the road…”, sounds like Victoria Beckham chasing cars up and down the street, only cars are really a musical career.  Mark went on to say “I’m not telling Beckham to take his family home. I’m just not sure why he came to America in the first place. Man, we don’t want your soccer. There’s no way Americans are going to buy the idea of 90 minutes of running around without much happening. Thanks for trying guys, but we’ll stick to baseball and basketball.”

David Beckham in Emporio Armani

Its no big secret that the Dangmeister isn’t into football, there is something just all kinds of wrong about 20-odd sweaty men with funky hair cuts, playing with leather in a field, who all shower together after that isn’t for me, so maybe me and Mark Wahlberg are on the same page, even though the above picture looks like he maybe he jealous of Victoria.

Pictures: Emperio, Calvin

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